Do I Really Need to Start Here?

Do I Really Need to Start Here?

If you want to go from having self-doubt to having confidence you must be willing to put in the work.  So many people are looking for a quick fix, the magic remedy, an overnight solution to all their problems.  It just doesn’t exist.  In order to gain confidence, you having to be willing to face the doubt head on.   

We must start somewhere so let’s start with facts!  (I like facts!!)

Definition of self-doubt

Lack of confidence in the reliability of one’s own motives, personality, thought, etc. 

Great! Now that we have a better handle on the fact that self-doubt is internal and does not come from others we can dive in deeper.  

Here we go 🙂 

People tell you to change your mindset.  Great. 

They say think more positively. Great.

Don’t allow yourself to think negative thoughts. Great.

Just keep moving forward. Great.

The problem with these suggestions is that they keep you from getting to the root cause of your issue. 

Self-doubt is real, and it comes from somewhere. 

If you had a horrible pain in your side that persisted and kept you from being able to function normally would people tell you just to keep moving forward, think positively, and don’t allow yourself those negative thoughts? 

NO!!! They would encourage you to do everything you can to get better, and that includes going to the doctor. 

Why are we so absurd when it comes to the mind!?!

We fear what we do not know.  If we don’t know how to fix something or if we don’t understand something, we sweep it under the rug and downplay its importance; especially when it has to do with our minds.

 Our world is great at doing that with mental wellness.  Self-doubt is in your mind.  If it is in your mind, it’s a belief you have that came from somewhere. 

Where did it come from?  Yes, the first thing or moment or person or experience that came into your mind is important. 

***Write it down in as much detail as you can. ***

This is where you discover the root cause. 

While you are writing this down, you might find that you remember something.  Something at an earlier time in life, sometimes a very recent moment.  Writing what you remember is the process of digging deeper. 

Most people don’t dig deep because it hurts, it’s scary, and we don’t want to feel hurt, pain, sadness, anger, etc.  All we want to feel are “good feelings.”  All feelings are good feelings.  I am learning this more and more every day. 

Every feeling tells us something.  Every feeling shows us we can feel.  It also tells us how we feel about others, situations, things, and more. 

 This is how we get honest with ourselves, learn to communicate with ourselves with a broader vocabulary, and how to take 100% responsibility for our actions in our lives. 

 This brings empowerment!

Empowerment brings the ability to face all that was so we can face all that is to come. 

Empowerment means you are able to overcome self-doubt and gain confidence.

Confidence is:

1a: a feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or of reliance on one’s circumstances

1b: faith or belief that one will act in a right, proper, or effective way

2the quality or state of being certain: CERTITUDE

There is more so I encourage you to read the rest.  Do your research. 

 From <https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/confidence>

 

 I want to remind you that “You’ve got this”!! It doesn’t matter what anyone else says or believes.  What matters is what you say to yourself when you are in the quiet, when you lay your head on your pillow at night. 

 

You might think this is so simple or this isn’t going to help me, if that is the case, I would ask you to remember the last time you went so deep inside your true self it hurt.

For you, it might be never unless it was required due to something you were participating in and you only did the bare minimum you had to so your response, research, etc. would look good.  

Another possibility is you did go within until it hurt, and you decided you never wanted to do it again.  

Last you might be the one that does this often, and you’re thinking, “Do I really need to start here? I’ve done this so many times.”? 

It’s a journey, and we will go through these moments because there is something more for us to learn.  The day you no longer must go internal to better yourself, and your life is the day you have “Arrived.”  The day that happens your work on this earth is done, and you have passed on to your eternal life.  

I HOPE you are still wanting and willing to go within.  

I want to encourage you to take action: When you have doubts come up in your mind, take control……You get to choose what to do with those thoughts.  Write them down, then write down what comes to mind from your past about those thoughts, (this is also about becoming self-aware) then you choose what to take from that and empower yourself to choose what you now want to believe about yourself. 

 You are enough!! 

You Matter!! 

Hang in there. I have a post coming soon about self-awareness!!!

  P.S. If there is something more you would find helpful for me to provide/create for you, please email me at clientcare@denaadams.com and/or share it here.  I’m here to serve you and empower you to “Declare Your Truth and Live with Confidence.”